my dream machine

my precious

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i am

life is goin pointless..

still 15 more days to go home.. can't wait!!

emptiness within me..

why the fish am i alive??

for whom am i alive??

for wat am i alive??

why do i have to die??

i am feeling the emptiness of my heart.. may be it will change.. may be not.. why do i care??

there are people everywhere wearing fake smiles..

at some point they stop being what they are and try to act like someone who they are not.. why??

they come to you just because u have something they need.. tat is how the world works ain't it??

some get what they want and move up ditching you!!

few get jealous for what you are and curse you!!

one r two might stay with you for what you are, if you are real lucky..

who defines what to do and what not to do??

who creates rules??

why do boys run behind girls?? is it because of pure lust?? if its love, then why do they ignore their present friends and run behind some unknown girl who looks pretty and try to create new a relation r friendship r watever they call it??

atlast wat is the result of doin this?? where does this end??

is having lust an unnatural thing?? its not bad until it hurts someone ain't it??

is it some kinda fancy thing to have a lot of girl friends?? waaz fancy about it?? they are just the other version of humans rite?

why do some people feel happy by hurtin someone??

why do people backtalk??

like said in V "People should not be afraid of their governments. Governments should be afraid of their people." why is this not happening??

being selfish is not tat bad, but why are people tooo selfish??

why did i write this dumb ass post??

தமிழில் தட்டச்சு செயுங்கள்

கூகுளின் புதிய கண்டிபிடுப்பு.. இப்போது தமிழ் font இல்லாமலே தமிழில் தட்டச்சு செயாலம்..


http://www.google.com/transliterate/indic/Tamil

politics

im thinkin of joinin politcs.. suddenly sprouted out from my dream!!

fav song

ricky's kiss

i got this while running thru few blogs,

deepavali

hmm.. today is deepavali @ my home town.. but here in bombay, the diwail is tomo..

sitting @ office early mornin.. shit man.. many relatives called me this mornin to wish me a happy deepavali, and wat was i doin?? sittin @ home without water to bath.. at last managed to get some water from my neighbours..

just had one full big dairy milk chocolate govindhaed by my company!! my stomach was making some funny noises since the last meal i had is yesterday's lunch!! after dairy milk, its back as normal!! :)

so.. still 7 more hours to kill.. Oil Empires is also down for the next version.. wat to do? wat to do?

special deepavali programs are being scheduled on sun tv today.. the movie chennai 600028 is also in tat list! shit man, i will b sitting @ office tat time! this is also a kinda fun,, when you miss something you never get bored! you always think about wats goin in there now!!

tomo, a great adventureous day.. planned to go for a trek to Matheran.. Initially i was planning to go alone, then told one of my friend about it after tat hopefully few others will join i guess!!

tomo mornin 6 o' clock, the journey starts!! I believe it will b a sexy memorable experience!!

Iniya Deepavali Nalvaathukkal!!

damn Income Tax

yesterday i heard from one of my friend that i will b payin 32000 as income tax if i don't show investments this year!! damn!!

so.. i have invest around 60000 more to avoid tax.. but if i invest 60k, 60k will go.. i wont b havin money to spend!! [still in deep thinking!!]

orkut fortune

Today's fortune: You and your wife will be happy in your life together

lol.. :)

weeee weeee ;(

my cellphone's display is gone!!!

weekend drive

hmm.. as i hoped it turned out to be a great weekend!!

went to shop a digi cam for a friend!! he bought some w90 r something.. nice one.. we were standing in the shop for about 2hrs stretch.. at last he made up his mind and bought it.. thank god!! after which in the name of newly purchased camera, we demanded a treat.. we ate some wraps and rolls..

then, when they left, me and one of my friend went for shopping dresses which were on some discount sale.. no idea abt what is in there, we went in.. not a big crowd too, which made us move freely within the shop.. after 20-25 mins, we both choose a jacket.. we later found out that it was a defective piece since it had holes all over it.. shit! waste of time.. then we again started searching in the huge mountain of jackets.. at last i found one wind cheater!! nice one actually!!

then we moved over to look for some cargo's.. it was really hard to find a cargo that fits my waist!! all were in 32, 34, 36 and 38.. even few 33's were there but no 30's!! after pushing few of the vendors, i found one cool cargo.. when i went to try it, the zip was broken.. few guys who work on the shop squeezed their mind and tied a tiny rope so that the zip is movable.. they promised me that once if the cargo fits, they will change the zip.. hmm.. when i tried it i found that its a girl's cargo!! shit shit and holy shit!! 45 mins gone!! loosing my dream coloured cargo, we moved over to the shirts section.. was wondering who in this world designed these shirts!! nothing was good!! at last we made up our mind to finish the purchases of the day and we walked towards the cash counter!! the guy said `no credit cards`.. shit again.. we went in search for an atm at last found one SBI atm.. it said `The last transaction is cancelled`and the machine is dead!! `great!` i said to myself.. i went back to the underground parking area to get my bike so that we will go in search of an atm.. gracefully we found a citibank atm and withdrew the money.. i told him that i am too lazy to walk back to the shop and buy them.. he told me to wait where i was and went to get the stuff we bought!! nice shopping ain't it??

then i asked him `what are you upto`.. he said `i am free`!! i said `then lets go for a drive!!`

he sat at the back and we started driving towards a blind destination!! i wore the newly wind cheater!! we started driving along the western express highway.. suddenly he said `lets explore malad!!` i heard malad had some fine beaches, so without hesitating i said `as you command captain!!`..

we then stopped at a shop where lots of chicken were hanging down all dressed up in some tasty masala.. it took us abt 20 mins to get a table since the restaurant had only five tables lol.. we ordered a butter chicken and few parotas which took almost 45 mins to get them on our table.. we watched a couple who came after us and watched them eat and leace.. dunno waaz the problem with us and the shop owner.. he never brought us the food which we order.. besides us there were three guys sitting an eating the hotel in wholesale.. we watched them eat three full tandori chicken to bones!! at last we finished our tasteless curry and few parotas which were made before 6-7 hrs i suppose.. we enquired about the way which will lead us to the beautiful beach shores which were running around our heads!!

malad!! at first it had very bad vomit initializing foul smell of dead fishes!! `shit man!! wat the hell is this place??` we followed the road which lead us to Marve Beach.. at first i was stunned to see the beach.. the place was covered with full of boats, which hid the beach which stood behind elegantly!! i was too scared to leave my girl friend at he parking area since few guys were checking on her!! it none other than my beautiful, the sexiest apache rtr!! so i took her into the beach!! she was wobbling here and there due to the beach sand!! suddenly i felt some chappathi dough like stuff on my feet!! gosh it was a snake and thankfully it was dead!! :) we spent long minutes in the beach.. it was 00:45.. no crowds.. 10-15 people were there.. we watched a few couples smooch and dogs doing their ^thing^.. we were back on the road!! we headded towards the Aksa Beach. no one was there except us two.. nice calm lengthy beach!! we listened to few songs, smoked few cigars and it was 01:45.. its hard.. but we made up our mind to get home!! he has this nokia phone, which i call as `the loudspeaker`.. we queued up few slow romantic songs and he held it in his hand while we drove back!! music while driving bike.. awesome.. the road was empty and my dear girl friend was running at a speed of 50kmph.. enjoyed the mild breeze along with the songs!! we reached the highway!! i wondered `shit!! what kinda city has traffic jams at 02:15 am!!` we watched cars going behind us at a great speed since she was flying at 100-110 kmph.. now the gentle breeze turned into a wild storm!!

i dropped him at his house and headed towards mine.. when i came home and switched on the tv, i realized that my bike's clock is running 30mis faster!! jus like her speed!!!! then i opened my laptop to check my inet connection's speed!! thankfully it was average and that is when i posted this blog!!

good night!!! :)

looooooooooong time no seee

after a long time.. I'm posting again..

the new company which i joined is cool!

but, since i am very bad at hindi i feel lonely there.. people always speak in their language.. i can understand a bit but.. just a few pieces of words.. i can do nothing but smile when they look at me :) what else can i do. poor me!! slowly trying to learn it.. but see I'm too lazy :P

apart from office life, life is great with my new ride.. it runs like a stream of water.. damn good bike..

yesterday went for a loong drive after the movie `jab we met`.. i guess its a good entertainer.. i guess it because i fell asleep after the interval.. lol.. and ya about the drive, went to a place called chota kashmir.. i wonder how they named it!! tat place dosen't deserve tat name.. nothing is there except a garden where couples come and smooch publicly.. felt embarrassed at first since i was alone but felt comfortable whn i tht abt the after effects of having a girl friend!! after tat drove chanceless plesant road with full of trees on the side.. the great abt this road is its in mumbai.. tat too inside andheri man.., almost for 3hrs i was wandering around that place.. after a long time felt like being near home!!

wat else, feelin a bit bored today being a weekend. will b starting out soon.. few of my friends are goin out for shopping.. hope the day is good!

Microsoft Mail's New Coool Domains for INDIA

Microsoft has unveiled its choosy e-mail id's..

Instead of having mail like @hotmail.com or @msn.com, this is a new approach for us Indians..

If u live in chennai u can choose yourname @ chennairocks . in, likewise for lot other major cities..

They have categorized their new approach into five,

• where i live,
• who i like,
• who i am,
• what i like and,
• i don't fit, for the rest

I dont know how far it is going to be a success. But its a fresh idea..

u can check this out here.

One of the forwards i got!!

..

Have u ever liked someone sooo much, that u just couldnt tell them?

have u ever had a sleepless night because u couldnt stop thinking about them?

have u ever felt so lonely that u cryed urself to sleep?

have u ever lost someone u loved and prayed every night for them to return?

have u ever felt the need to hurt urself on the outside because u couldnt stand the hurt inside?

my answer is “YES” for all the questions.. i think, most of those who live in this creepy earth's answers will be “YES”.. so which dumbest f%$#$r makes questions like this..??

the beginning of the end.. [ under construction ]

..

its really amazing when we think about the transitions that we humans go thru..

from a baby, who just knows nothing more than crying to a boy who expects some love..

from a boy to a teenager who thinks of his own and learns how to make some good decisions..

from a teenager to a young man who tries to make a living of his own..

a young man to an adult who gets the meaning of love life and creates his own gift out of it by adding a +1/.. to the world population..

manythings change during this transition.. our physical appearance, our voice, the way we think, how we handle things `n` lot more..

i am thinking about the changes i went thru while i blog this..

in preperatory school i was one of the brightest.. i was a bit like a hero.. believe it or not, my teacher used to paste my answer papers in my class notice board just to show the other students how to answer the questions..

like the dialogue in kannathil muthimittal ( a tamil movie ), “en vazhikilla periya prechina ithu thaan.. tamil teacher..” it perfectly matches me.. why all my tamil teachers are mostly like the same.. why GOD why..??

i was a lie bag in those days.. i was caught red-handed by my tamil teacher for not completing my class assignments..

my parents were called up and were asked to come to the school immediately..!!

gosh..!! i was thinking of committing a suicide after killing my tamil teacher before she talks to my parents.. :)

this made me very very guilty.. my parents out of frustration were damn upset..

who wouldn’t be upset after all?? they both are college professors and their son i like this..

what i did was not a crime.. but.. guess it yourself..!! i’ll narrate what i did.. ( don’t laugh after reading )

i hated my tamil teacher.. she always scolds me just because of the fact that i was the pet ( not literally ) of my class teacher, who was her rival..

she used to ask me a lot of tricky tamil grammatical questions, in which my `basement koncham weeku..!!`

she used to insult me, beat me up and makes me stand out of the class ( the other meaning of an outstanding student )

i never got this yet.. wat did i do wrong? is it a crime when you are loved by someone??

so what i did was,
she ( my tamil teacher ) used to correct our class notes weekly.. she stores them in our class cupboard..

being close to my class teacher, i had access to the cupboard.. i took all the notebooks of my fellow students and was planning to hide them, which in-turn will make my tamil teacher hold the responsibility.. i tht my very strict principal would scold my tamil teacher like this.. “where are all the notes?? where did u loose them..?? the students have their exams in a few days and

how am i answerable to their parents??”

but wat actually happened is,

my school’s clerk who rings the school’s bell was passing by my class.. i got frightened and tht of hiding the books.. no one was allowed to touch the stuff in the class cupboard except the faculty.. gosh.. i was standing with all the notebooks in my hand right before the cupboard.. i went crazy.. didn’t have a clue.. there was this stream of water passes by our class.. in tamil we call it as `paathi`.. this water runs to the agricultural land.. i threw all the notebooks into it.. ( our class was more like a hut.. no windows or anything.. all open.. i mean there was a wall which covers up the half and the other half left open! )

i told before that, i saw the clerk.. but he never saw me till he heard the sound of these notebooks falling into the water..!!

man i should not have done that.. i should have stayed calm..

now anyone can guess what happened after this..

then as i advanced from preparatory school to the next secondary education, my mindset changed..

i was thinking, `i am not a small boy now.. i am a big boy!! i don’t want to be a geek!!`
my words made me loose interest in my studies..

i was ranked 4 in my sixth grade, which gradually increased to 24th during my ninth!
my dad was going mad on me.. even i started to skip classes.. i failed in my favourite subject English! i cannot forgot that i got a 24 outta 100!

since i was in hostel, i am not directly accesible to be scolded by my dad.. the only way was thru phone!! good that i was in hostel.. besides he is the best father in the world..

How Evil Are You?

You Are 72% Evil

You are very evil. And you're too evil to care. Those who love you probably also fear you. A lot.

How Evil Are You?

check out ar rahman's new website..

http://www.arrahman.com/flash.html

check this out.. realy cool website for the mastero..

ants gone now its time for centipedes..

          At last i got rid of all the ants in my room.. now lots of centipedes started coming.. previously while i was a boy i get scared of them like hell.. after seeing too much of them in my room, the child, the father and mother, the grand father and grand mother, the great grand @#$%, its more like i dont get scared anymore.. they all used to play their family games in my room all the time.. i wonder whether they have some family supper daily r wat..

          Now again i need to go thru some web pages and refer wiki `HOW TO KILL CENTIPEDES`..

          As per my knowledge and research, i can classify them into three types.. the red one, the brown one and the black one.. When you see the black one, it makes your adrenaline flow like a river becoz of its size..

          I guess my next post will be on something like `how to kill centipedes` lol..

          My room will workout as a dream lab for a zoologist i guess.. sooner or later some insect mutation is gonna happen and i wish something will bite me and i will turn into a superhero like spider man r something :)

How to kill ants

If anyone is as frustrated as i am about ants, try these..

Method 1

1. Purchase pipe tobacco from your local store.
2. Soak it in warm water overnight.
3. Decant the liquid and throw away the soggy tobacco.
4. Pour the liquid over the anthill - they overdose on nicotine and die.
5. Follow the trail of ants to determine where they come into the house.
6. Locate the holes, apply the holes with soap or white glue.
7. Apply baby powder on the trail of ants. Ants that come in contact with the powder will die soon.
8. Apply more baby powder or red pepper to kill the remaining ants. After they are dead, sweep away the ants and excess powder or red pepper.
9. If ants enter the house from the windows, use chalk around the window frame. You will be amazed to see how they move away from any chalk lines!
10. You can also mop the floor with about half liter of water mixed with two to three drops of lavender essential oil. That will keep away ants away, too.
    

Method 2

1. Get a shot glass, some salt, and some sugar. Take your middle finger and put it in the bottom of the shot glass, pour the sugar around your middle finger.
2. Take the salt and quickly remove your middle finger then pour it in the crater left from your middle finger.
3. Take the shot glass and find the ant hill.
4. Put the shot glass down so the open drinking end is on the ground and pull it up. This should leave a small pile of sugar with a salt core.
5. The ants will find the sugar and begin to eat/transport it into their hill. They will keep doing this until they can no longer taste the sugar, then start to get into the salt, which kills them.
   

Method 3

1. Fill a spray bottle with highly concentrated soap water.
2. When you see ants, just spray them and they'll be dead on contact.
3. Wipe up their nasty dead carcasses with whatever they were trying to eat.
4. Within an hour, any stragglers will have dissipated.
   

U can also try,

• Try a natural repellent such as ground or powdered chili, or used coffee grounds. Citrus peel (ground) works well too. They hate the smell of vinegar; make a solution with water to spray around.
• For a more permanent solution, find the ant mound, and destroy it using boiling water.
• If you can't bear to kill them, at the start of summer leave a jar of honey up a tree in the garden. The ants will be happy to stay out of your kitchen.

rehman's another chef-d'oeuvre

Tamil Version - ONE LOVE

Nice IT Quotes! really good do read

UNIX is simple. But It just needs a genius to understand its simplicity.
--Dennis Ritchie

Before software can be reusable, it first has to be usable.
--Ralph Johnson

Good judgment comes from experience, and experience comes from bad judgment.
--Fred Brooks

Theory is when you know something, but it doesn't work.
Practice is when something works, but you don't know why it works.
Programmers combine theory and practice: Nothing works and they don't know why.
It's hard enough to find an error in your code when you're looking for it;
it's even harder when you've assumed your code is error-free.
-Steve McConnell Code Complete

If builders built buildings the way programmers wrote programs, then the first woodpecker that came along would destroy civilization.
-Gerald Weinberg

The Six Phases of a Project:
Enthusiasm
Disillusionment
Panic
Search for the Guilty
Punishment of the Innocent
Praise for non-participants

Good code is its own best documentation. As you're about to add a comment,
ask yourself, 'How can I improve the code so that this comment isn't needed?'
Improve the code and then document it to make it even clearer.
--Steve McConnell Code Complete

The trouble with the world is that the stupid are sure and the intelligent are full of doubt.
--Bertrand Russell

No matter how slick (efficient) the demo is in rehearsal,
when you do it in front of a live audience the probability of a flawless presentation
is inversely proportional to the number of people watching,
raised to the power of the amount of money involved.

One of the main causes of the fall of the Roman Empire was that, lacking zero, they had no way to indicate successful termination of their C programs.
--Robert Firth

Fifty years of programming language research and we end up with C++?
--Richard A. O'Keefe

C programmers never die. They are just cast into void.
If debugging is the process of removing bugs, then programming must be the process of putting them in.
--Edsger Dijkstra

You can either have software quality or you can have pointer arithmetic;
you cannot have both at the same time.
--(Bertrand Meyer)

(Thoughtful Ones...)

There are two ways to write error-free programs; only the third works.
--Alan J. Perlis

Measuring programming progress by lines of code is like measuring aircraft building progress by weight.
--Bill Gates

The first 90% of the code accounts for the first 90% of the development time.
The remaining 10% of the code accounts for the other 90% of the development time.
--Tom Cargill

Programmers are in a race with the Universe to create bigger and better idiot-proof programs
The Universe is trying to create bigger and better idiots.
So far the Universe is winning.
--Anon

:)

Tobacco-free work places all over India - Mad r wat these guys are??

war against tobacco

"The government recently announced that all places of work in the country will be declared smoke free and those found flouting the law will be strictly punished."

Tobacco control in the country..?? is it really feasible..??

"People can then smoke on roads or homes, provided their wives allow them," words from Health Minister Anbumani Ramadoss adding that even at home they will have to seek the permission of their maids as they are their employee..??


checkout this artilce [http://in.rediff.com/money/2007/jul/20smoke.htm]

Quote of the Day!

Give me six hours to chop down a tree and I will spend the first four sharpening the axe.
- Abraham Lincon

General Shortcuts in the Sony Ericsson

Getting smileys while composing text messages
press the 1 key three times

How to see the phone blockage
Press <**<

How to go to the service menu
Press >*<<*<*

Finding your IMEA number
The IMEA number on your cell phone is a 15 digit number of the format nnnnnnnn-nnnnnn-n-nn.To find it, you have to press *#06# on your keypad. It will display your IMEA number.

Glossary
< move the joystick left
> move the joystick right

Terminator's Hand is for REAL now!!!

"Today's Magic is Tomorow's Science" -- by someone, but it seems like his words are true.. i-Limb, the new bionic limb, for people with missing limbs!

Advances in technology are making the daily headlines. Thanks to those mechanical engineers who have made this movie prototype come for real.

At $18,000, it ain't cheap. But it is pretty freakin' cool.

Check out the touch bionics website link about i-limb http://www.touchbionics.com/professionals.php?section=4

I was just reading about this i-Limb and i also came to know that the C-Leg, a high-tech prosthetic leg, is also on its last testing phase. Soon only our brain will be natural.. we all will be like roboCop soon. I believe it will take time to create an artifical brain.. If created, the world will be like what they show in i-robot.

Man these sci-fi movies are comin true!

The skulls that prove we all came from Africa

check out this article,
://news.independent.co.uk/sci_tech/article2782518.ece

is this really true??

Joke of The Day

There once was a lady who was tired of living alone. So she put an ad in the paper which outlined her requirements. She wanted a man who...
1) would treat her nicely
2) wouldn't run away from her
3) would be good in bed.
Then, one day, she heard the doorbell ring. She answered it, and there on the front porch was a man in a wheel chair who didn't have any arms or legs.

"I'm here about the ad you put in the paper. As you can see, I have no arms so I can't beat you, and I have no legs so I can't run away from you."

"Yes, but are you good in bed?"

"How do you think I rang the doorbell?"

Tax Calcualtion for Salaried Individual

Basic

Dearness Allowance (DA)

House Rent Allowance (HRA)

Conveyance allowance

Children Education Allowance and Hostel expenditure allowance

Leave Travel Concession (LTA)

Perquisites



Basic

Your basic salary is fully taxable


Dearness Allowance (DA)

DA is fully taxable

Rent Allowance (HRA)

HRA is given by an employer to an employee to compensate towards any rent he may be paying towards house accommodation. But this element is tax-free only if you are actually paying rent. To ensure this, the income tax laws restrict the exemption that you can get on the HRA to the lowest of the three conditions:

Mumbai/Kolkata/Delhi/Chennai	Other Cities
HRA actually received	HRA actually received
Rent paid in excess of 10% of salary	Rent paid in excess of 10% of salary
50% of salary	40% of salary

(Salary = basic + DA + commission if paid as a fixed percentage of sales)

How to calculate taxable amount

Step 1 - Take the figure of HRA received during the year

Step 2 - Calculate the lowest of the three amounts mentioned in the table above according to the city you are staying in

Step 3 - Deduct Step 2 from Step 1

The balance is taxable


Conveyance allowance

This is an allowance that an employer gives his employee to meet the expenses that he incurs to commute from his home to the place of work. An amount of up to Rs 800 per month is exempt from tax. Any amount paid over and above this is taxable. In case the employee is orthopaedically handicapped, the tax-free limit
on this allowance is Rs 1,600.


Children Education Allowance and Hostel expenditure allowance

The employer can pay an amount of Rs 100 per month per child for up to two children to his employee towards children\'s education. He can also pay Rs 300 per month per child for up to two children towards hostel expenditure. Both these would be tax-free.


Leave Travel Concession (LTA)

This is a concession that an employer may pay his employee as reimbursement towards any travel expenses within India that the employee may incur while he is on leave. The travel expenses maybe incurred for the employee and his family. The nature of taxation of this particular concession is slightly complicated.


While this concession or allowance can be paid to the employee every year, it is treated as tax-free only for two journeys in a block of four years. The 'block of four years' has been defined by the income tax laws. They are 1998-2001, 2002-2005, 2006-2009 and so on. These are calendar years.

Let us explain with an example. Suppose your employer pays you Rs 10,000 every year as LTA. Suppose the 'block of four years' is 2002 to 2005. During this period of four years, you can make two journeys, which are tax-free. You can make both journeys in any one of the four years or spread out the journeys over the four years. For any journeys in excess of these two, any reimbursement or allowance paid will be taxed.


The reimbursement would be restricted to actual travel expenses. However, there is an overall ceiling on this, which is restricted to:

Air travel	Economy fare of national carrier(India Airlines or Air India)
Rail travel	First class AC fare
Road	Public transport - First class or deluxe classIf there is no recognized transport - Equivalent of first class AC fare

So what happens if the first time you are receiving LTA is in the year 2005? In order to claim it as tax-free, you must make the journey in the same year to get a tax exemption. You can make two journeys in the same year if you cannot exhaust your limit in one.


Medical re-imbursement

An employer can re-imburse the expenditure incurred by the employee on himself and his family. This amount would be tax-free to the extent of Rs 15,000 per annum.


Perquisites

What are perquisites?

Perquisites or perks as they are commonly referred to are benefits that an employer gives to his employee in addition to his regular salary. These are usually in the form of kind such as accommodation or motorcar or even concessional loans and so on.

These are not part of the monthly salary of the employee, and hence cannot be taxed directly. But they are benefits that the employee receives instead of a cash salary and hence form a
part of taxable income.

Which are the perquisites that are taxed?

The Income Tax laws have identified certain categories of assets or benefits that will be considered as part of income and therefore taxed. The main categories are:

• Residential accommodation provided by the employer to the employee
  
• Use of motor car
  
• Services such as that of a gardener, watchman, sweeper or any personal attendant that the employer provides to his employee
  
• Provisions such as gas, electricity or water that the employee uses in his house but which is paid for by the employer
  
• Any free education or concessional education provided to the employee or his family
  
• Interest free loans
  
• Reimbursement of holiday related travel or accommodation
  expenses
  
• Festival gifts or vouchers
  
• Individual club membership
  

How is tax on perquisite calculated?

The tax on perquisite is calculated on the basis of a value attached to each item. The calculation of this value varies from category to category. Nevertheless, the thumb rule across all categories is that only those benefits that the employee uses for his personal purpose will be considered as perquisites. Further, if the employee pays any amount towards using these facilities, such amount would be reduced from the perquisite value before the tax is calculated. The total of
all perquisite values will be added to the salary income and tax will be calculated on the usual slabs.

QUOTES OF THE DAY!

"We are not retreating - we are advancing in another direction."
-Douglas MacArthur

"We could never learn to be brave and patient, if there were only joy in the world."
-Hellen Keller

he he!!

At school, a boy is told by a classmate that most adults are hiding at least one dark secret, and that this makes it very easy to blackmail them by saying, "I know the whole truth" -- even when you don't know anything.

The boy decides to go home and try it out. As he is greeted by his mother at the front door he says, "I know the whole truth." His mother quickly hands him $20 and says, "Just don't tell your father."

Quite pleased, the boy waits for his father to get home from work, and greets him with, "I know the whole truth." The father promptly hands him $40 and says, "Please don't say a word to your mother."

Very pleased, the boy is on his way to school the next day, when he sees the mailman at his front door. The boy greets him by saying, "I know the whole truth." The mailman drops the mail, opens his arms and says, "Then come give your FATHER a big hug."

QUOTE OF THE DAY!

If you make people think they're thinking, they'll love you; But if you really make them think, they'll hate you.
- Don Marquis

Einstein's theory may be relatively wrong

August 8, 2002 Posted: 4:43 AM EDT (0843 GMT)

Ref: [CNN] (http://archives.cnn.com/2002/WORLD/asiapcf/auspac/08/07/australia.lightspeed/index.html)


SYDNEY, Australia -- The crux of Einstein's theory of relativity -- that E = mc 2 -- is under challenge, following evidence that the speed of light might be slowing down.

The discovery, made by a team of Australian scientists, undermines Einstein's key formula which maintains that the speed of light must remain constant.

The speed of light is measured as roughly 300,000 kilometers (186,300 miles) a second.

The team's findings, which are published in the latest edition of respected science journal Nature, are causing a major stir in the lofty circles of theoretical physics.

Team leader Paul Davies, of Sydney's Macquarie University, says that if the speed of light has slowed over billions of years, physicists will have to rethink many of their basic ideas about the laws of the universe.

"That means giving up the theory of relativity and E = mc2 and all that sort of stuff," Davies told Reuters news agency on Thursday.
QUICKVOTE Do you understand E = mc2?
Yes No Sort of View Results EXTRA INFORMATION Animation: Violations of relativity theory in space CNN.com Asia More news from ourAsia edition "But of course it doesn't mean we just throw the books in the bin, because it's in the nature of scientific revolution that the old theories become incorporated in the new ones."

What Davies and his team did was study a 12 billion-year-old stream of light.

CornerstoneThey discovered it did not have the properties it was expected to, and by a process of elimination deduced that the speed of light must have been much faster billions of years ago.

"It's entirely possible that the speed of light would have got greater and greater as you go back," he told the Herald Sun newspaper.

"If the speed of light were nearly infinite in the first split second [of the universe's creation] it would explain why the universe is so uniform."

The implications of the discovery -- if it is proven correct -- are not necessarily clear.

Einstein: Time for a rethink? "When one of the cornerstones of physics collapses, it's not obvious what you hang onto and what you discard," Davies told Reuters.

"If what we're seeing is the beginnings of a paradigm shift in physics like what happened 100 years ago with the theory of relativity and quantum theory, it is very hard to know what sort of reasoning to bring to bear."

'All bets off'"For example there's a cherished law that says nothing can go faster than light and that follows from the theory of relativity," Davies said.

"Maybe it's possible to get around that restriction, in which case it would enthrall Star Trek fans because at the moment even at the speed of light it would take 100,000 years to cross the galaxy.
"It's a bit of a bore really and if the speed of light limit could go, then who knows? All bets are off."

Davies is a Professor of Natural Philosophy at the Australian Center for Astrobiology at Macquarie University.

Last week he received the British Royal Society's Michael Faraday Award for his efforts in furthering the public communication of science, engineering or technology in the United Kingdom.

Davies has a worldwide reputation as an enthusiastic and skilled communicator of contemporary physics issues.

Give Me Blood! I Promise You Freedom!!

Give Me Blood! I Promise You Freedom!!

At a rally of Indians in Burma, July 4, 1944

This was the statement he made at the great rally where he was elected with
acclaim as the leader of the freedom movement in East Asia. The speech infused
new life to a movement which had been weakened by internal dissentions.
. .
. . . . Editor,

Friends! Twelve months ago a new programme of 'total mobilisation' or 'maximum sacrifice' was placed before Indians in East Asia. Today I shall give you an account of our achievements during the past year and shall place before you our demands for the coming year. But, before I do so, I want you to realise once again what a golden opportunity we have for winning freedom. The British are engaged in a worldwide struggle and in the course of this struggle they have suffered defeat after defeat on so many fronts. The enemy having been thus considerably weakened, our fight for liberty has become very much easier than it was five years ago. Such a rare and God-given opportunity comes once in a century. That is why we have sworn to fully utilise this opportunity for liberating our motherland from the British yoke.I am so very hopeful and optimistic about the outcome of our struggle, because I do not rely merely on the efforts of three million Indians in East Asia. There is a gigantic movement going on inside India and millions of our countrymen are prepared for maximum suffering and sacrifice in order to achieve liberty.

Unfortunately, ever since the great fight of 1857, our countrymen are disarmed, whereas the enemy is armed to the teeth. Without arms and without a modern army, it is impossible for a disarmed people to win freedom in this modern age. Through the grace of Providence and through the help of generous Nippon, it has become possible for Indians in East Asia to get arms to build up a modern army. Moreover, Indians in East Asia are united to a man in the endeavour to win freedom and all the religious and other differences that the British tried to engineer inside India, simply do not exist in East Asia. Consequently, we have now an ideal combination of circumstances favouring the success of our struggle- and all that is wanted is that Indians should themselves come forward to pay the price of liberty. According to the programme of 'total mobilisation', I demanded of you men, money and materials. Regarding men, I am glad to tell you that I have obtained sufficient recruits already. Recruits have come to us from every corner of east Asia- from China, Japan, Indo-China, Philippines, Java, Borneo, Celebes, Sumatra, Malaya, Thailand and Burma…

You must continue the mobilisation of men, money and materials with greater vigour and energy, in particular, the problem of supplies and transport has to be solved satisfactorily.
We require more men and women of all categories for administration and reconstruction in liberated areas. We must be prepared for a situation in which the enemy will ruthlessly apply the scorched earth policy, before withdrawing from a particular area and will also force the civilian population to evacuate as was attempted in Burma.

The most important of all is the problem of sending reinforcements in men and in supplies to the fighting fronts. If we do not do so, we cannot hope to maintain our success at the fronts. Nor can we hope to penetrate deeper into India.

Those of you who will continue to work on the Home Front should never forget that East Asia- and particularly Burma- from our base for the war of liberation. If this base is not strong, our fighting forces can never be victorious. Remember that this is a 'total war'- and not merely a war between two armies. That is why for a full one year I have been laying so much stress on 'total mobilisation' in the East.

There is another reason why I want you to look after the Home Front properly. During the coming months I and my colleagues on the War Committee of the Cabinet desire to devote our whole attention to the fighting front- and also to the task of working up the revolution inside India. Consequently, we want to be fully assured that the work at the base will go on smoothly and uninterruptedly even in our absence.

Friends, one year ago, when I made certain demands of you, I told you that if you give me 'total mobilization', I would give you a 'second front'. I have redeemed that pledge. The first phase of our campaign is over. Our victorious troops, fighting side by side with Nipponese troops, have pushed back the enemy and are now fighting bravely on the sacred soil of our dear motherland.
Gird up your loins for the task that now lies ahead. I had asked you for men, money and materials. I have got them in generous measure. Now I demand more of you. Men, money and materials cannot by themselves bring victory or freedom. We must have the motive-power that will inspire us to brave deeds and heroic exploits.

It will be a fatal mistake for you to wish to live and see India free simply because victory is now within reach. No one here should have the desire to live to enjoy freedom. A long fight is still in front of us.

We should have but one desire today- the desire to die so that India may live- the desire to face a martyr's death, so that the path to freedom may be paved with the martyr's blood.

Friend's! my comrades in the War of Liberation! Today I demand of you one thing, above all. I demand of you blood. It is blood alone that can avenge the blood that the enemy has spilt. It is blood alone that can pay the price of freedom. Give me blood and I promise you freedom.

Subash Chandra Bose's Speech!

TO DELHI, TO DELHI

Speech at a military review of the Indian National Army, Jnly 5, 1943

SOLDIERS of India's Army of Liberationl! Today is the proudest day of my life. Today it has pleased Providence to give me the unique privilege and honour of announcing to the whole world that India's Army of Liberation has come into being. This army has now been drawn up in military formation on the battlefield of Singapore, which was once the bulwark of the British Empire.

This is not only the Army that will emancipate India from the British yoke, it is also the Army that will hereafter create the future national army of Free India. Every Indian must feel proud that this Army, his own Army, has been organized entirely under Indian leadership and that when the historic moment arrives, under Indian leadership it will go to battle.

There are people who thought at one time that the Emrpire on which the sun did not set was an everlasting empire. No such thought ever troubled me. History had taught me that every empire has its inevitable decline and collapse. Moreover I had seen with my own eyes, cities and fortresses that were once the bulwarks but which became the graveyards of by-gone empires. Standing today on the graveyard of the British empire, even a child is convinced that the alnmighty British empire is already a thing of the past.

When France declared war on Germany in 1939 and the campain began, there was but one cry which rose from the lips of German soldiers--"To Paris, To Paris !" When the Brave soldiers of Nippon set out on their march in December 1941 there was but one cry which rose from their lips-"To Singapore. to Singapore !" Comrades ! Soldiers ! Let your battle-cry be-"To-Delhi To Delhi ! " How many of us will individually survive this war of freedom, I do not know. But I do know this, that we shall ultimately win and our task will not end until our surviving heroes hold the victory parade on another graveyard of the British empire, the Lal Kila or Red Fortress of ancient Delhi.

Throughout my public career, I have always felt that though India is otherwise ripe for independence in every way, she has lacked one thing, namely an army of liberation. George Washington of America could fight and win freedom, because he had his army. Garibaldi could liberate Italy, because he had his armed volunteers behind him. It is your privilege and honour to be the first to come forward and organize India's national army. By doing so, you have removed the last obstacle in our path to freedom. Be happy and proud that you are the pioneers, the vanguard, in such a noble cause.

Let me remind you that you have a two-fold task to perform. With the force of arms and at the cost of your blood you will have to win liberty. Then, when India is free, you will have to organize the permanent army of Free India, whose task it will be to preserve our liberty for all time. We must build up our national defence on such an unshakable foundation that never again in our history shall we lose our freedom.

As soldiers, you will always have to cherish and live up to the three-ideals of faithfulness, duty and sacrifice. Soldiers who always remain faithful to their nation, who are always prepared to sacrifice their lives, are invincible. If you, too, want to be invincible, engrave these three ideals in the innermost core of your hearts.

A true soldier needs both military and spiritual training. You must, all of you, so train yourselves and your comrades that every soldier will have unbounded confidence in himself, will be conscious of being immensely superior to the enemy, will be fearless of death, and will have sufficient initiative to act on his own in any critical situation should the need arise. During the course of the present war, you have seen with your own eyes what wonders scientific training, coupled with courage, fearlessness and dynamism, can achieve. Learn all that you can from this example, and build up for Mother India an absolutely first-class modern army.

To those of you who are ofiicers, I should like to say that your responsibility is a heavy one. Though the responsibility of an officer in every army in this world is indeed great, it is far greater in your case. Because of our political enslavement, we have no tradition like that of Mukden, Port Arthur or Sedan to inspire us. We have to unlearn some of the things that the British taught us and we have to learn much that they did not teach. Nevertheless. I am confident that you will rise to the occasion and fulfil the task that your countrymen have thrown on your brave soldiers. Remember always that officers can make or unmake an army. Remember, too, that the British have suffered defeats on so many fronts largely because of worthless officers. And remember also that out of your ranks will be born the future General Staff of the Army of Free India.

To all of you I should like to say that in the course of this war you will have to acquire the experience and achieve the success which alone can build up a national tradition for our Army. An army that has no tradition of courage, fearlessness and invincibility cannot hold its own in a struggle with a powerful enemy.

Comrades ! You have voluntarily accepted a mission that is the noblest that the human mind can conceive of. For the fulfilment of such a mission no sacrifice is too great, not even the sacrifice of one's life. You are today the custodians of India's national honour and the embodiment of India's hopes and aspirations. So conduct yourself that your countrymen may bless you and posterity may be proud of you.

I have said that today is the proudest day of my life. For an enslaved people, there can be no greater pride, no higher honour, than to be the first soldier in the army of liberation. But this honour carries with it a corresponding responsibility and I am deeply conscious of it. I assure you that I shall be with you in darkness and in sunshine, in sorrow and in joy, in suffering and in victory. For the present, I can offer you nothing except hunger, thirst, privation, forced marches and death. But if you follow me in life and in death, as I am confident you will, I shall lead you to victory and freedom. It does not matter who among us will live to see India free. It is enough that India shall be free and that we shall give our all to make her free. May God now bless our Army and grant us victory in the coming fight !

Inquilab Zindabad ! Azad Hind Zindabad !

Few Definitions

 

School:  A place where Papa pays and Son plays.

Life Insurance:  A contract that keeps you poor all your life so that you can die Rich.

Nurse:  A person who wakes u up to give you sleeping pills.

Marriage: It's an agreement in which a man loses his bachelor degree and a woman gains her masters.

Divorce: Future tense of Marriage.

Tears: The hydraulic force by which masculine willpower is defeated by feminine waterpower.

Lecture: An art of transferring information from the notes of the Lecturer to the notes of the students without passing through "the minds of either"

Conference: The confusion of one man multiplied by the number present.

Compromise: The art of dividing a cake in such a way that everybody believes he got the biggest piece.

Dictionary: A place where success comes before work.

Conference Room: A place where everybody talks, nobody listens and everybody disagrees later on.

Father: A banker provided by nature.

Criminal: A guy no different from the rest....except that he got caught.

Boss: Someone who is early when you are late and late when you are early.

Politician: One who shakes your hand before elections and your Confidence after.

Doctor: A person who kills your ills by pills, and kills you by bills.

Classic: Books, which people praise, but do not read.

Smile: A curve that can set a lot of things straight.

Office:  A place where you can relax after your strenuous home life.

Yawn: The only time some married men ever get to open their mouth.

Etc.: A sign to make others believe that you know more than you actually do.

Committee: Individuals who can do nothing individually and sit to decide that nothing can be done together.

Experience: The name men give to their mistakes.

Atom Bomb: An invention to end all inventions.

Philosopher: A fool who torments himself during life, to be spoken of when dead

 

 

 

Good One / Bad One

Getting married is very much like going to a restaurant with friends. You order what you want, then when you see what the other person has, you wish you had ordered that.

*********
       
Man: Is there any way for long life?
Dr: Get married.

Man: Will it help?
Dr: No, but the thought of long life will never come.

*********
       
Why do couples hold hands during their wedding?

It's a formality just like two boxers shaking hands before the fight begins!

*********
       
Wife: Darling today is our anniversary, what should we do?

Husband: Let us stand in silence for 2 minutes.

*********
       
It's funny when people discuss Love Marriage vs Arranged.

It's like asking someone, if suicide is better or being murdered

*********
       
It is difficult to understand GOD . He makes such beautiful things as women and then he turns them into Wives

*********
       
If u r married please ignore this MSG,

For everyone else: Happy Independence Day

*********
         
Before marriage, a man will lie awake all night thinking about something you say.

After marriage, he'll fall asleep before you finish.

*********
       
There's a way of transferring funds that is even faster than electronic banking. It's called marriage

*********
       
Galfriends r like chocolates,
Taste gud anytime.

Lovers r like PIZZAS, Hot n spicy, eaten frequently.
Wife r like Dal RICE, eaten when there`s no choice

*********
       
Man receives telegram: Wife deadshould be buried or cremated?

Man: Don't take any chances. Burn the body and bury the ash.

*********
       
Prospective husband: Do you have a book called 'Man, The Master of Women'?

Salesgirl: The fiction department is on the other side, sir.

*********
       
Q: Why dogs don't marry?

A: Because they are already leading a dog's life!

*********
       
There was this guy who told his woman that he loved her so much that he would go through hell for her. They got married and now he is going thru hell.

*********
       
Fact of life: One woman brings you into this world crying & the other ensures you continue to do so for the rest of your life!

*********
       
Q: Why doesn't law permit a man to marry a second woman?

A: Because as per law you cannot be punished twice for the same offence!


*********

 

some jokes i found to crack!!

Wife: Honey: What are You Looking for in that paper ?
Husband : Nothing.
Wife : Nothing...?? U've been reading our marriage certificate 4 an hour ??
Husband : I was just looking for the expiry date.

**********

Q - What is the difference between Mother & Wife?
A - One Woman Brings U into this world crying & the other ensures U Continue to do so.

**********

Wife: You always carry my photo in your handbag to the office. Why?
Husband: When there is a problem, no matter how impossible, I look at your picture and the problem disappears.
Wife: You see, how miraculous and powerful am I for you?
Husband: Yes, I see your picture and say to myself, "What other problem can there be greater than this one?"

**********

Girl: When we get married, I want to share all your worries, troubles and lighten your burden.
Boy: It's very kind of you, darling, but I don't have any worries or troubles.
Girl: Well that's because we aren't married yet.

**********

Son: Mom, when I was on the bus with Dad this morning, he told me to give up my seat to a lady.
Mom: Well, you have done the right thing.
Son: But mum, I was sitting on daddy's lap.

**********

A newly married man asked his wife, "Would you have married me if my father hadn't left me a fortune?"
"Honey," the woman replied sweetly, "I'd have married you NO MATTER WHO LEFT YOU A FORTUNE"

**********

Father to son after exam: "let me see your report card."
Son: "My friend just borrowed it. He wants to scare his parents.."

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Interviewer to Millionaire: To whom do you owe your success as a millionaire? "
Millionaire: "I owe everything to my wife."
Interviewer: "Wow, she must be some woman. What were you before you married her?"
Millionaire: "Billionaire"

**********

Girl to her boyfriend: One kiss and I'll be yours forever.
The guy replies: Thanks for the warning.

**********

A wife asked her husband: "What do you like most in me my pretty face or my sexy body?"
He looked at her from head to toe and replied: "I like your sense of humour.

**********

one of the forwards i got

Have u ever liked someone sooo much, that u just couldnt tell them?
have u ever had a sleepless night because u couldnt stop thinking about them?
have u ever felt so lonely that u cryed urself to sleep?
have u ever lost someone u loved and prayed every night for them to return?
have u ever felt the need to hurt urself on the outside because u couldnt stand the hurt inside?

my answer is “YES” for all the questions.. i think, most of those who live in this creepy earths’ answers will be “YES”.. so why do these guys make questions like this..

my first post

I was just curious about the services provided by google! I have my own iGoogle and i was working on `Google Documents`. That is when i saw Blogger mentioned in the list of services.. So why not try it.. i tht to myself! and here i am writing my first post.. I know i am going to give up writing.!! lol.. I have started many blogs and they all became Orphans! I hope atleast here i can hang around a bit!